Simon Says

I'm going to call this show Simon Says

I've got Iron Chef Michael Simon here, and he's cooking up some of his favorite comfort foods

He's sharing the secret to his mama's famous lasagna. It almost feeds the soul as well as the belly, doesn't it

And then he's showing me how to make the ultimate burger, the Lola Burger

Good is not the word. And I've got some special treats for him, too

a decadent coconut cream bread pudding with a chocolate velvet sauce. You like sauce

I do. And a little something extra to top it all off

I haven't had heron bread pudding since I've been like six. I've got in here in my kitchen today with me

Michael Simon, and you'll recognize him. Iron Chef. He is here today

You are part Italian, part Sicilian. Sicilian, Italian. And then my mother is Sicilian and Greek

Sicilian and Greek. But we're cooking Italian food today. We are. We have got his mama's lasagna

My mom is the greatest cook. Is she? The greatest cook. Is that where you got your love for it

I did. You know, I was lucky enough to grow up in a family where food, everything revolved around food

We sat down at the dinner table all the time. You're going to start heating your pot, darling. I like that. I like that. Okay. Okay

Okay, do you want olive oil in there? Yeah, a little olive oil. Look, can you say it again

Olive oil. Oh, that's so nice. Just enough to perfect. Okay. That's perfect

We're going to start sweating our garlic and onions. We're just going to put in one diced onion

Do you want to put a nice big pinch of salt in there? Okay, yes. All right, if you'll pass me the salt cellar

Okay, you do it. Here, I'll go. You do it. We'll start. So, you want some pepper

Are we fired up? A little bit of pepper. Okay. Now, I see you got bay leaves up here

so I'm assuming we're going to put a bay leaf. One or two bay leaves. Okay, one or two

Okay, there you go. How many cloves of garlic did you put in? Four cloves of garlic mince. Okay

Get those sweated, get that aroma going, and then we're going to brown all our meat. I just get all pork neck bones, beef, veal, sausage

and it's just this. I have never put neck bones in lasagna

That's where all the flavor comes from. It gives the sauce like that nice. The bones, the bones

It's all about the bones, baby. Don't fool with meat that doesn't have bones. No

As soon as that meat comes off the bone, it loses all its flavor. Yeah. You know, what's the good of that

All right, now, do you want me to shove this in? Let's do it. All right, pound of the veal and the pound of the veal

And we're going to add the neck bones. And then we have a pound of the spicy Italian sausage

You've removed the casing. So, do you want me to throw them in there whole, Michael

We'll just break them up. Okay. And then we're just going to let this all brown up

All right, I'm going to move these out of the way for you, Michael. Oh, you cook, you clean, you do it all

Listen. And you have that wonderful hair. I mean, it doesn't get any better than this

Oh, you would say that if I had. This is such a treat. You would say that if I had two twigs of hair

That's coming from a man that has none. That is two more twigs than me. You have two more twigs of hair than I do

Well, I'm glad you like it. Thank you. Well, this is, we're going to, oh, pop that open

Oh, the tomatoes. We're going to put in 28 ounces of tomatoes. Okay, so I'll get this open for you

Can diced tomatoes. And my mom always, San Marzano is the key. San Marzano tomato

Okay. All right? All right. Do we cut this with any water

A little bit of white wine. Okay. And let me know now, Michael, when you want me to go down with our heat

All right. We're just going to drop this down to a simmer. Okay. Put that lid on there

And just let it cook away. Can you reach that lid? The tomatoes are going to... I got it. You got it

I got it. And we're going to let it cook for how long, Michael

Until it's done. Do we need to call my... Through four hours

Okay. Well, come on down and show me what you got. Would you like to be in control of the board

Because I'm truly at your disposal today. Oh, you're going to see that

I'm not going to do anything but take orders. Simon says. So we're going to have that great meat ragu, and then this is going to be the cheese layer

It's ricotta, a little bit of parmesan, and some fresh mozzarella. Dump those two containers of the ricotta in there

Ricotta, ricotta. Ricotta. Ricotta. And then I'm going to chop up these fresh herbs

Okay. So there's two pounds of ricotta in here, and then we're going to put in a quarter cup of basil

quarter cup of sliced parsley, and a quarter cup of oregano. So, what I want to know about the Iron Chef is how you qualify

You competed against other people. Well, I was on Iron Chef once as a competitor before I was an actual Iron Chef

I lost to Morimoto. Well, that's all right. But I got my revenge against him in the holiday battle

Did you win? Yeah. Bobby and I beat him in cat. No. Do you love Bobby Flay

He's the best. And you're gonna grate a half a cup of that fresh Parmesan cheese in, right

Right in there Gives it a little saltiness you know All right now how about these eggs over here You gonna crack the eggs right in there Do you want me to crack crack the eggs and beat those up You know I just want to talk to you I don want to cook I just want to hang out and chat Well say that so I just want to just chat

This could be like the 24-hour lasagna. Well, I'm in. All right

All right, so I'm going to put a little bit of salt in there. I'm delighted to have you today. All right, so were you ready for that

It's perfect. Okay, good. I was just going to say put the egg in. Okay, good. Um, I don't fully get the Iron Chef as far as how it works and how it becomes one

I think what happens is... But so since you beat Marimoto, are you an Iron Chef

I'm one of them. It's myself, Bobby, Morimoto, Cat, and Mario. Are you posing for the camera

Yes, I am. I'm doing a photo op. And then we just added a new one this year, Jose Garces

I am with an Iron Chef, so don't go anywhere. Coming up, Michael and I put together his delicious lasagna

My mother is going to be so proud. And grilling up his decadent Lola burger

Michael, you ball-headed devil. And later, my coconut bread pudding, y'all. That is love in a bowl

Yes. Hey, y'all, welcome back. I'm in the kitchen with one of the Iron Chefs

Michael Simon, and I'm having a wonderful time with him. He is making his ma's lasagna

Can I taste it yet? The chunks have fallen off the neck bones. Oh, my gosh

I love a neck bone. Here, you taste this, and while you're chewing, I'm going to go get those noodles

Oh, my goodness. Huh? It's love in a pot, I'm telling you

There's so much happiness in there. How much does your wife weigh? Oh, about 110 pounds

But I chase her around a lot, you know, So I haven't caught her in 20 years

She's quick as a cat, I tell you. If I was your wife, I'd weigh 250 pounds

All right. You've got our lasagna noodles. Now they're done. I'm going to stand by with the ricotta

All right. And you just tell me when you're ready for me to come in. So I'm just going to put a layer of noodles down

Okay. These noodles are hot. Okay. And you've just used a regular noodle

Any tips there? Yeah, we just cooked it until it's el bente. You don't want to overcook it. And then layer of sauce

Okay. We put a cup of sauce down. Uh-huh. And then another layer of the noodles

Are you ready for me? Cheese me. I'll cheese you. Put half that cheese down

Half the cheese. Okay. And are you going to spread this over it

We're going to spread it out. Okay. Put a little bit of fresh mozzarella with that. Great

So you want me to just take my spatula and kind of spread? That's perfect

This is fresh mozzarella. Mm-hmm. More delicate. Do you just get that from the grocery store

Yeah, right at the grocery store. But most grocery stores nowadays have fresh mozzarella

Yes. So it's not a problem. Yes, most of the grocery stores today are really full, full service

Another layer of noodles. More mozzarella

And more ricotta. Okay, and is this going to be the last of the ricotta

Yeah, and then we're going to put on those. Okay, so I can be very generous. You be generous

This is going to be fabulous when we grate into this. And all this is going to melt down, and the cheese kind of holds it together

Yes. You know, I think it's going to be good enough to make you want to slap your mama

Look at that. And then I'm just going to break some of this matzah on top

Okay, do you want me to break? Okay, yes. And you want to break that arm right on top? This is incredible

This is incredible. My mother is going to be so proud. Hopefully we're going to make your mama proud

So, 350, one hour, and it's dinner time. 350, one hour, y'all

One of the items that I read about in your cookbook was this Lola burger

and I cannot wait. You tell me what to do. We've got our cheese up here

We have the cheese. We grounded the meat coarsely. I don't like a fine-ground burger

Right. So this is a mix of, it has chuck, sirloin, and brisket

So we have about 25% fat. All right, now, what are these eggs for

Are we going to fry those eggs? We're going to fry the eggs on top of the burger. I adore a fried egg on my burger

Me too. So, and I don't pack them too tight. I keep them kind of loose. You need that air in there

Here, we'll see. I season them pretty liberally. Yes. The salt. Give me the flip

Uh-huh. Season yours. Thank you. Give me the flip. All right. Yes

And then a little bit of cracked black pepper. Yes. Now, they just go down and..

Put it on the grill. Yes Perfect

And then we're going to cook these how we like. We're going to each have a burger, so let's crack two of these eggs

Okay. Ready? Yes, I'm ready. Yes, I'm going to just do mine in here first to make sure it's all right

And we'll put a little bit of perfect salt on the egg

Okay, and is this a cheddar? Cheddar, an aged cheddar. And please let your cheese melt

once you put it on the burger. Yes, yes. You know, I was reading a lot of your tips in your book

and you and I think a lot of light, Michael. Does that scare you

It takes more than that to scare me. Now, if I wake up with a southern accent

that would scare me. I'd like to wake up with your hair

That would be very exciting. Well, listen, I got a spare wig in my closet. You like my hair

I have so got you fixed. I'm wearing it. I haven't had hair for 20 years

This is going to be so exciting. Well, honey, you fix have plenty of hair. We're going to look like twins

All right. Perfect. Got your eggs. Give me a couple English muffins. We're just going to toast them up here

I love the fact that you use English muffins. And the nooks and crannies hold all the juices. Mmm

Your burger. Yes. Your egg. I want you to fix my burger just like you would at Lola's, okay

Some of those pickled onions. Okay. Put a couple pickles on there for you. Mm-hmm

I'm going to put some onions on mine. Mine's going to run down my chin. Yes, it is

Oops. Okay, let's go. I go with the go big or go home theory

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Oh, my gosh. Michael, you bald-headed devil. Aren't they good

Good is not the word. Coming up, Michael and I get a taste of his mama's lasagna

This is incredible, y'all. And I've got something to top off my coconut bread pudding, y'all, and our Iron Chef

It is a very exciting day, isn't it? Y'all, I've got an Iron Chef in my kitchen

How exciting is this for me? We have just taken his lasagna out of the oven

My, it looks delicious. Oh, look at this. A little bit of fresh basil on top

Yes, yes. I have just pillaged your garden. I'm going to give it some cut

Plates. Look at that. Oh, boy. Oh, my gosh. We did good

Now, again, you know, not super saucy, but super flavorful. See, I love it

I'm not even waiting on you, Michael. That's okay. Mmm. This is incredible, y'all

Mmm. So humble, yet so nourishing. It almost feeds the soul as well as the belly, doesn't it

Mmm. Y'all must try it. I need some dessert. I need to make you some dessert

Good. Now, come on down here. All right. I want to share a recipe with you

You know, Southerners love bread pudding. It is one of my favorites

So, I'm making you a coconut bread pudding. We've got six eggs here. Okay

Now, if you would divide four of them for me. Okay. Because we're going to need two whole eggs and four yolks

So, four yolks. All right. I can do that. I do it with my hands. Is that okay, Paula? Yeah, please

All right. All right. Now, I'm going to be cutting up our bread. And I've got a loaf of French bread here, Michael

And I'm just going to cube it. That looks good. Now, this is good fresh bread, but the great thing about bread pudding, y'all, is you can use the older bread, any kind of bread you got

This is getting cubed up pretty good. I could eat half a loaf of this with butter

You love bread and butter. Oh, my God. Are you kidding me? Like, the worst part of my life was in the 80s when those low-carb diets

I was on it. Never, ever. I couldn't do it. A Greek and Italian, I couldn't live without bread

You poor baby. No, it wasn't going to happen. No, you got to have some bread. So why don't you jump in here and help me queue up this bread

I need a fourth of a teaspoon of nutmeg, fresh nutmeg. Uh-huh, I'm going to do a pinch of mace, and I'm going to do about a fourth of a teaspoon of salt

All right. And this is what makes this bread pudding so outstanding

We're going to use two cans of unsweetened coconut milk. You make it sweet all on your own, Paula. No

Listen I going to fall for you Oh look how creamy and rich it is Yes Oh you ain seen creamy and rich yet honey Look what Meemaw got in this jar

I have got cream of coconut, y'all. And this is like a 13

and a half ounce can of cream of coconut. And that's where we're getting the sweet

Yes. Look how rich. There we go. Look how rich this is. This looks fantastic

already. I know. I love coconuts. I do too. It's one of those things either you love or you hate

All right, now I'm going to measure out a cup of sweetened flaked coconut

All right, now if you put the eggs... What do you want me to do with my eggs? Plop them right in? Uh-huh. Just plop those in

And I'm going to be spraying our pan. All right. Oh, my God, this is so good

This is not a light dessert. No. You know, light and dessert are two words that should never go together

Now let's see how much we can pack it in, because as that bread absorbs the liquid

Oh my God, that is lovin' a bowl. Yes. As it absorbs that liquid, it's actually gonna collapse

All right, now what we're gonna do, Michael, is cover this for one hour

Okay, so all absorbs in there? In the refrigerator, yes. We're gonna let that bread soak up all those liquids

Oh, boy. We are one hour closer. Yes, yes, we're getting close

All right, now, if you'd put it in our dish, because we're going to cook this in a water bath

Oh, all right. Because we don't want the bottom to, you know, get brown and burnt

So it cooks nice and even. Right. All right, now, we're going to take a piece of tinfoil

If you would pour our water in there. The only thing to do now is just top it with a little bit more fresh coconut

So if you would just cover that with the foil. All right, we're going to bake it, y'all, in a 325-degree oven for one hour

I'm really trying to impress this Iron Chef. I'm impressed. I'm very impressed

Coming up, Michael can't hardly wait for my coconut bread, please. Whoa

I'm ready to whisk now. You're excited, aren't you? Okie dokie, welcome back

You know, I promised Michael before we went on break that we were going to make this coconut bread pudding over the top

It just keeps getting better. By making a chocolate velvety sauce. So what we're going to do is heat a half a cup of heavy cream

I've heated that. Now we're going to put one cup of semi-sweet

Whoa! I'm ready to whisk now. You're excited, aren't you? I am. The excitement's got the best of me

All right, just whip that up, honey. I had no idea, y'all, that when I planned this dessert

that coconut is Michael's favorite all-time dessert. My birthday dessert every year is a coconut cake

Coconut lemon cake. Yep. Well, we want to serve our coconut cream bread pudding

We're going to serve it cold. Okay. Now, it's delicious hot, but this is..

Should I bring the sauce down, Paul? Oh, yes. All right, now here we go

Oh, look at that. Just a little sauce. You're teasing me, Paula

You like sauce? I do. Chocolate and coconut. All right. Just a little toasted coconut

We have to have our vegetables. All right, now, hold on, y'all

There's just one more thing that Michael needs. All right, hurry up. You've got to go get that hair

I won't eat any of this until you get back. You better put that down, boy

Come here. This is exciting. I think my head's too big. Oh, my God

You know, it's not the mullet that I used to fashion in the 80s, but this is good stuff

What do y'all think? Product? You could be my child. You could be my child

I like it. I'm feeling it. This is the perfect day I am

I haven't had heron bread pudding since I've been like six. It is a very exciting day, isn't it

Paula, this is over the top good. This is going to be my new birthday dessert

Is it really? A whole new birthday treat for me. You are so hot

You're too hot for words. Look, I'm shedding. Do you know what I always say at the end of my show

when I tell all my friends goodbye? Y'all. Y'all. Michael and I always, always send you loving best dishes

from our kitchens to yours. We'll see you next time