How to Get Cold Beer Quickly

In my endless pursuit to get the coldest beer quickly

this is what I've come up with. I've got my beer in a container here and lots of ice

Let's put in about half of this ice. And I'm going to add some water that'll help break this ice down

and get it all around my bottles. and we're going to make us a nice little ice bath for our beer

You can spin it, too, if you really, really, really got to go quick

I'm going to top it off with the rest of our ice, and just like an ice cream maker

I'm going to encase all of that coldness by using coarse salt on the top

Just like an ice cream maker, this will keep the ice from melting too quickly

and it'll harden up, and it'll be a nice, tight, ice-cold bath

for my beers. And speaking of beer and a tip, if you ever have a beer

like this and you don't have a bottle opener handy, if you find a spoon

it's simple physics, y'all. And you can pop it right off. Any

straight hard object will help you appreciate your beer better. Cheers, y'all

Ah! you