Caramel Party

Hey, y'all

Tonight on Paula's Party, it's all about creamy, ooey-gooey caramel. Do you have one of those at home, too

Yes, I do. I've got funny lady, Suzy Z. Essman, from Curb Your Enthusiasm

Oh, please. She's going to be here making caramel glazy scallops. And then supermodel Tyson Beckford is making a caramel cake, y'all

And then my buddy and food guru, Ted Allen, with apple caramel pork loin and cornbread stuffing

Y'all come on in. It might just get sticky. So let's party

Hey, everybody! How are you? Hey, y'all

How are you? Welcome to the party. Tonight is all about caramel

It's a caramel party. And my first guest that I'm going to bring out, y'all

you would think that she's not a sweet girl. she is one of the stars on curb your enthusiasm come on out suzy asman come on out here girl

oh i got a turk like dancing we're doing a whole thing

Thank you. Thank you for coming. Oh, I'm so happy to be here

Listen, I ain't going to mess with this girl. I'm so afraid I'll get cursed out. You know what

What? I hear you don't cook. I don't cook. You know, but I heat

You heat? I'm a great heater-upper. You heat me? I'm a great heater-upper. Well, Suzy, the first dish that we're going to make is so very easy

It's called seared scallops with a caramel glaze. How does that sound

That sounds yummy. Well, as we were getting ready to get started, I could hear this noise that I'm not accustomed to in here

Oh, yeah, I know. Do you hear it? Yes, it's this caramel thing. I just turned around and saw what it was

Isn't that yummy? A caramel fountain. Mm. You want to go visit it for a second

All right, now, Susie, I'm going to teach you one of my old tricks

Now, I want you to just come up here. Yeah. I want you to stick out your tongue and put it in there

Oh. Is that disgusting? No. It's so good. Isn't that delicious

You know, I'm so much better at eating than cooking, I have to tell you. Well, you know what

Because us cooks have to have you eaters. Well, there you go

Well, and I'm an eater, too. Paula, but caramel is just sugar, right

Yeah. Okay. Well, that's why it's so good. Yes, it is. All right, so here we go

We're going to caramelize some onions. All right. So come on over here

Yeah. And I'm going to put you in a little olive oil

Olive oil. Okay. And you know what? Butter. I'm going to marry a little butter into our oil

You know, the butter gives it such a wonderful flavor. Butter and sugar

Hello. Yes. All right, so all you're going to do is throw your onions in there

We've got a little sugar, and we're just going to let them caramelize. So throw all that in

Throw it in. I understand. Throw the best sugar in. Yes, throw the sugar in

Throw the sugar. Don't put it in. Throw it in. Yes. All right, now I understand that you've started seeing a man, fell in love with a man

Yeah, and he's a good cook. He is a good cook. Well, he has four daughters, doesn't he

Three daughters and a son. Three daughters and a son. Four teenagers. Y'all have got to have a ball together

Yeah, we have a lot of fun. But, you know, teenagers, they're slightly mentally ill. You know, absolutely

And it's very hard to love your own teenagers that you gave birth to

Let alone someone else's. Let alone somebody else's. So my hat's off to you. But I do love them

You just love them for who they are. You just love them. But can they eat

Four teenagers. You know the food they go through? Absolutely, honey. you've got four pairs of hollow legs walking around your house trying to figure out how the

hell you're going to fill them up. All right. So we're going to just make like a simple syrup

kind of like. Okay. We've just got sugar. We've got corn syrup and we've got water. No butter

No butter. What the heck is going on here? All right. So when you do stand up, do you have

trouble with hecklers? Oh, nobody ever heckles me. They're too afraid. You know what? Suzy

See, I heard that there is no way a man would heckle you. No

Because you're scared of you. That's right. And most hecklers are men. Not women

Women are too smart. Whoa, I need to cut your fire down. Now, this corn syrup is very icky

Yes, it's very icky. It's syrup. Okay. Okay. Yeah, but, you know, and I think men don't want to heckle a woman who seems in charge

because they don't want to be humiliated by a woman. Oh, honey, listen, there's so much about this girl I've got to find out

Don't go anywhere. because, you know what? If you would, I think I'm going to ask you

when we come back to class my husband. Oh, my pleasure. My pleasure

We'll see y'all back in a minute. Ballers party. Next, y'all, that funny girl, Suzy Espin

can't curb her enthusiasm for my caramel sea scallop. This is the perfect thing for me

And later, Tyson Beckford and a delicious caramel cake. Whoo-hoo! Look at that

Welcome back, y'all. The Sweet Divine. I'm here in New York City, and I'm here with Suzy Esmond

And believe it or not, this girl gets paid for cussing people out

I do. Isn't that the greatest job in the whole world? You know what? I thought I had a good gig

No. Oh, it's so much fun. I think yours might be better, Suzy

It's good. All right, I'm just getting our pan ready for our sea sconce

Why are you stepping by? Because I was afraid I was going to... Shh! Now, while I'm doing this, I want you to put salt and pepper on our sea scallops. Okay

And you can see we using the sea scallops They really big Yeah Yes A base scallop you know would be the little one that you want to use maybe for stews and soups And I love the big fat generous scallops you know

So listen, sometimes us wives, it's not a good idea for us to say some of the things that maybe we're feeling in our heart

So my husband, Michael. Michael. Is sitting right there. So, would you do me a favor

Oh, yeah. Turn your back and just cuss them out. But just tell me

But, Paula, tell me something annoying he's done recently. He annoys me by if he drops it, he doesn't pick it up

If he opens it, he doesn't close it. If he turns it on, he does not turn it off

Okay. Now, Mike, I am going to give it to you right now. But just know I'm in character. It's not me, Susie Essman

It's Susie Green, the character I play on Curb Your Enthusiasm. Yeah, right. All right

You have to turn your back. Michael, you bearded, slob, piece of dung, pick up your things

That's all. And y'all, listen to this now. All right, now, we have kind of pressies down in some sugar

See, you did that stuff. You're good at that. Well, I was doing that because you were busy cussing out my husband. Yeah

All right. Do you know that women walk up to me on the street and shove cell phones in my face and say

it's my husband, curse him out? They really do that. You know what else I heard

What? I heard that you get paid to call people up and cuss them out

Well, for charity. I only do it for charity. For charity. That's true

I do it for charity. But listen to this, y'all. On Curb Your Enthusiasm, it is all impromptu

She has not one word of a script. Dialogue. Unbelievable. Well, and actually, all that filth that comes out of my mouth, I make it up

I take credit for all that language. But some people will. What are we doing here

Oh, all right. Our caramelized onions. We're going to make our vegetables. We're going to toss these in our green beans that we have kind of cooked al dente

Okay. So you like blanch them first? Yes, just blanch them. And just some more butter

Just put some more butter in. And we're going to put in some sliced almonds

And how's that for a wonderful vegetable? This is delicious, but you know what kills me here

What kills you? It looks great. If I had everything all measured out like this ahead of time, I might cook too

Well, you know what? One of the things about being successful in the kitchen is being prepped

Really? Make sure you're very well organized. Make sure you've read through the recipe thoroughly

You know, understand everything. And just have it all out ahead of time before you start

Yes. And before you know it, honey, you'll be just another Betty Crocker

Oh, please. Yes, you will. There's always one ingredient, though. You know when you look at a recipe and there's always that one weird ingredient, you're just like, leave it out

Really? Leave it out. Okay. Okay. Isn't that right? You know, a recipe, Susie, a recipe is great for the first time you make a dish

But then after you make it that first time, yes, improvise. Make it your own

Add something or take something out. Just like we do on Curb

No scripts. Just like you do on Curb. That's exactly right. You're cooking without a recipe on Curb

Doesn't that look delicious? Do you like seafood? What's your favorite thing to eat

I love fish and I love vegetables. This is the perfect thing for me. Oh, great

Are they done yet? Out of this world. They're almost done. And you don't want to overcook them

All right, now I'm going to take some of your yummy-looking green beans

And I'm going to fix your plate. This is the best guest thing I've ever done

I'm so glad. I get fed. I have fun. I get to talk to Paula

We have the most fun at our parties. Our crew is fabulous

Our guests are fabulous. Look at them. Our fans are fabulous. It's so great

Look at them. They're really starting to get caramelized now. You want them nice and browny, right

I like them really caramelized. All right, so I think I have you enough

So I'm going to cut those off. Ha, ha, audience, I get to eat it

All right, I've just, our sauce has gotten a little hard. So all we have to do is throw a little heat to it

Oh, baby. All right, let's dig in. Look at this. Look at how delicious is this. How gorgeous is this

Oh, my God. There's something about the caramel. Just for you, my pumpkin. Oh, my God

I never want you cussing me out. Do you like it? This is so good

Eat your heart out, everybody. You can do this. I can. I won't, but I can

We'll be right back, y'all. It's caramel time at Paula's party. See you back in a minute

Take it away, sweetheart. Well, you say I treat you badly. But I make you feel so sad, baby

Up next, Tyson Beckford and a delicious caramel cake. And later, Ted Allen with apple caramel potlone

Sweet divines, y'all. Welcome back, y'all

We're in the middle of having a fun, caramble party tonight. And my next guest, y'all

especially you girls, one of the world's top male models. He's an actor

He's a producer. He is host of Make Me a Supermodel on Bravo

Y'all please welcome Tyson Beckford Come on out Tyson What's up baby

What's up with you baby? How you doing? I'm told to give you a nice big hug

Thank you I knew it What's up baby? Come here honey What's up baby

Oh, you ain't ready for this. Oh, you ain't ready, baby. I know I am

Don't you stop. Don't you stop. Your husband, where's your husband? Come on over here

Okay. Because, you know. Oh, yeah. I saw this on camera. I want to treat you

I treated Susie. Oh, I like pretzels. Oh, we ain't fooling no pretzels, honey

You can take your pretzels over there and munch on those while we're cooking. Okay. But right now, I want you to taste my caramel

All right. Straight up. Okay. So, uh. Ready? Yeah. All you do is stick out that pretty little tongue of yours And just go huh Go in OK Oh my goodness

I got it on my nose. Now I got it on my nose. That was good. Was that good

Did you like it? I like it. That's extra 50 sit-ups for me, but it's all right

I bet you the next time I see you'll be telling me about that fountain machine in your living

room or your bedroom. I might need to get one of those. Or your kitchen. That's nice

So, girl. Mmm. Mmm, tasty. You've got, like, abs. 500 a day, baby

500 a day. You do 500 sit-ups a day? I do 500 a day, yeah. Can I see

37 and 500. No. I can't see. I got the wire on and all that

I know, and I just want to see right there. I just want to see your six-pack

Look at his breeches. Come on, let's not advertise for that. You got them on inside out, don't you

No, no, that's the way they're supposed to be. Because I'm reading it backwards. Oh, no

Behave yourself. Behave myself. Okay? It's great to have you. Hey, great to be here

Wait, I see tattoos. Oh, they're all over. They're all over. Where, like where

Uh... I got to roll my sleeves up to get cooking anyway, so..

Yeah, what about that, huh? You didn't have those in the 60s and all that wild part of it

No, we did not. Okay. Let's start cooking good looking. Look at this super model, honey

I'm going to make you what cinch the deal with my husband, Michael

Okay. You know, I could look at this boy and tell he liked to eat

Mm-hmm. So I said, it's going to be time to pull out my caramel cake

Yeah. I made it for him, but when I made it for him, I made like seven layers

Wow. So you and I are just going to make three layers. Okay. And do you want to beat or add

What do you want to do? You tell. I like to beat. You like to beat? I like to beat

Okay. Then you get over there and beat. Oh, man. Now, we've got butter

Uh-huh. And we've got sugar here that we have creamed until it's kind of light

Uh-huh. So what we're going to do, if you'll crank it up. Okay

I can get it cranked. Let me get it started. Whoa. Yes, I bet you can. There you go. Yeah

All right. Now, I'm going to add one egg at the time. Okay

If you would just beat, you know, and don't be afraid of your mixer

You cook, don't you, Tyson? Yes, I do. Well, just beat. Being a single dad, you have to

My grandmother used to let me do this. Uh-uh. Now, which grandmother

On my mother's side. On your mother's side. Yep. She taught me how to sew

She taught me how to cook. Get out. Yeah, because I was like, I was one of those kids

Yeah, I was one of those kids who would get into everything. So, instead of keeping me out of everything, she would have me doing something

So what have you been up to? Well, besides hosting and making me a supermodel, I got into racing

Like NASCAR? Yeah, I just applied for my NASCAR license two weeks ago

You're kidding. You want to drive a race car? Yeah. Yeah. You're not scared

Nope. Are you going to do it? Yeah, I start practice with a team, a friend of mine just acquired, so we're going to get in there

Oh, my goodness, how exciting. You have a 10-year-old son. Yep. Y'all, I'm adding flour and milk, and I'm alternately adding those

You're just measuring by eye, huh? Yeah. You like me. The most important thing when you're making a cake is that you start with your dry ingredients and end with your dry ingredients

And I don't know why, but it just makes for a creamier cake. Okay

I don't think I'm getting all this mixed up right, but I'm trying. I'll come in here with a spatula

Oh, we're doing it together. Yes, we're doing it together, honey. There you go, baby

We're baking this cake together. There you go. See, that gets all that in there

Okay. All right, more flour. And remember, we're going to start with flour and end with flour

How much flour should we put in? Well, I think the recipe calls for maybe three cups

Okay. And how many cups of milk? One cup. Okay. You know, you can always go on the website and get the recipe

So all we're going to do now, Tyson, at this point is we're going to divide our cake batter into three pans equally

We're going to put them in a 350-degree preheated oven. We're going to bake them for 25 minutes

And when we come back, Tyson and I are going to make some filling. My mama's filling, and then we're going to make some frosting

So we'll see y'all right back. I think it's all done now, huh

You're ready, honey. Uh-oh. Give it all over. Up next, more Caramel K with Tyson Beckford

And later, Ted Allen with Apple Caramel Polk Loan. I think pork is the chef's favorite cut

Even the vegetarians love bacon. Aren't they great, y'all

The sweet divines. Tonight is caramel night here at Paula's party, and I'm in here with this hunk of hunk of burning love Tyson

I'm trying to make him a caramel cake if I can settle down and focus

And while I'm going to be making our filling and making our frosting

I want you to tell us all how you became a supermodel

Well, I think I became one on accident because there wasn't really any male supermodels

I've got melted butter here. I'm throwing in brown sugar and cream. Oh, yeah, that's me, brown sugar, baby

Brown sugar. I'll put the cream in there, mix it up. So I'm going to add the cream

So I basically just started my career out here in New York

was discovered in Washington Square Park and, you know. Born in New York

Born in New York and went on go-sees, saw different photographers. One of the first guys was Bruce Weber

And he said, hey, man, I need you to go to Ralph Lauren for an audition

So I went to Ralph Lauren. They didn't like me at first. They said I was too big. And then I came back

Too big? Yeah, muscular. Because I was a lot bigger than this. And came back the following week

And then, you know, I booked an ad campaign. And that was it, you know

Oh, look, y'all. Whoa. Whoa. I was 12 when I did that one

You were 12? Have y'all in the control room? Do y'all have some more

You didn't have any boxers on or something? Oh, no, I did. I just, I think it was too much down there

so they wanted to say too much. Yeah, we had a problem with that. No

This is the first time this week I've worked up a sweat. All right. I'm starting to sweat

It's getting hot in the kitchen, baby. All right, now I want you to beat this for me

Okay. Now, I have brown sugar, I have melted butter in here, and I have cream. I am making you a foolproof caramel icing

You know, my mother used to make this burnt caramel icing. Well to me for some reason I just had problems with that one Now I just going to just switch this to the bowl and I going to ask you to beat up the confectionate sugar into this

Okay. Just dump that sugar in. The whole thing? Get your mixer. Okay. Yes

Take your mixer and just beat it up. Just beat it up again

So anyway, this filling that I'm using, y'all, was my mama's caramel icing

and I couldn't get it to turn out. So when I was writing the lady and son's just desserts, you know, I said to heck with it

I'm going to go ahead and make Mama's caramel icing recipe. And I'm just going to use it as a filling rather than icing

So this cake is the one that sealed the deal for my husband and me

Or they say the best way to get to a man is by his stomach. It's through his stomach every time

All right. I agree. I've got my three cake layers that we cooked

Now, I'm going to take a wooden spoon, and I'm going to go around here, and I'm going to punch holes over the entire layer

That's old school. Yes, it is. It is. You know, I came, speaking of schools, I came from the school of make do

Make do with what you got. Make do with what you got. Okay, is this supposed to be this thick

Yes, it's going to be real thick, but if you'll turn that up a little bit. Okay. So I'm just going to drizzle that filling in there

Look-a-here. And it's going all down in those holes. And it falls into the holes

Yes. So you think you want to race cars, do you? Yeah

I mean, I want to try it. And you're going to risk messing up that pretty face

Oh, no. I'll have on a fire suit and a helmet. And nowadays, the NASCARs are a lot safer than, you know, regular street cars

Are they? Yeah. You're boxed in there so tight. They're going to have to take a can open and get you out if you're getting a wreck

I understand that to be the case. Yeah. That y'all are really, really hooked in

Yeah, I'm stuck on speed. I overheard you talking to my producer a few minutes ago that you want to produce

Oh, well, I started producing already. You already have. What have you produced

I did two movies last summer that I starred in. One was called Kings of the Evening with Lyndon Whitfield, James Russo, Bruce McGill

Reginald T. Dorsey. It was a lot of, like, veteran actors. And I was, like, the youngest, you know, on set

So it was, like, trying to tell these veteran actors what to do is not really cool, you know

I was going to say, was that kind of intimidating for you

No, it was kind of cool because I came at them on a party note, you know

Let's go out and have a drink, you know. And then that's where you kind of break it to them

So that was something I never dealt with before. Yeah, you don't realize how much

And dealing with, like, models and, you know, underwear and having to deal with musty union men is a different story

But it's all right. So come down here, Dumplin'. Okay. You want me to keep beating? Look-a-here

If you want to, you can keep beating, but I'm going to be tasting cake

All right. So this cake is so much better if you'll let it sit and let it drink in all that caramel

Mm-hmm. And then put your icing on. Well, here's the complete cake

That's the finished one. This is the finished cake. Okay. And I would love to cut you a piece

All right. I'm a big boy, so I like big pieces. Is that big enough

Be sure to cut it nice. There you go. After I eat this, I'm going to fall asleep

Look here. Look what you're doing. I'm going to fix you. Hold on

Let's throw some strawberries on here. Uh-huh. Throw anything you want to. There you go

You said you liked pretzels. Oh, look at that. It looks visually good now. Does that not look delicious

We'll pin him up there, V. Yeah, let's glaze him on there. Uh-huh

Oh, wow. And you want some pretzels? You like sweet and salty

Yeah, let's put some pretzels in there. You said something about you liking pretzels. Okay, put pretzels right there. Yes

There you go. That's good. Oh, you got apples, too. This is one kick piece of cake

Look at that. It sure is. Look at his creation, y'all. Woo-hoo

Look at that. Look. Mm-mm-mm. Look at that. Uh-oh

It's going limp. It's going limp. Got to get back up. Just take it off and eat it

There you go. All right, go to it, honey. Dig in. Wow

Mmm. Is it good? Mm-hmm. I'm so glad that you like it

Y'all don't go anywhere Because it's all about caramel tonight And we'll see you back in a minute

In the meantime enjoy Sweet Divine Up next Ted Allen

With apple caramel potloin Is here my hometown is Caramel, Indiana? Oh come on

I thought that was why you invited me Isn't that a clinky dink? Thank you

Party is a sweet party. It's all about caramel. And my next guest is a cookbook author, y'all

He's a television host, and he's a food and wine guru who came to fame on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy

Y'all, please welcome Ted Allen, my buddy. Come on out, Ted. Come on out, Ted

How are you? How are you? I'm wonderful. Thank you. What have you got

Well, now Paula. It's great to have you here. Thank you so much

It's great to be at the party. Ted and I have had the pleasure of working together on two or three occasions

It's always a pleasure. He is such a nice guy, y'all. I brought you a present

Now, this was a little more full when I got here. Who ate it? Susie Essman got into it in the green room

And now the crew's gotten into it, and they didn't realize it was for you. Listen, that little broad can eat

She may be tiny, but she can eat. There's nothing sexier. Well, you know what

Nothing sexier than what? There's nothing sexier than a woman who eats. Oh

I think. Works out perfect. I agree. Oh, my goodness. What is this

Now, I have to tell you, this is bacon brittle. No wonder I thought it was so good

The sweet and the salty. Exactly. The best of both worlds, y'all

All right, so let's get to cooking. All righty. Because you're going to be making us an apple caramel pork loin

and I'm going to be using my cornbread stuffing recipe. We're going to marry our two recipes together

That sounds great to me. Well, this recipe I think is really wonderful because, of course

apples have traditionally often been served with pork. It's a great recipe. combination. Yes. So why not bring it all together as one? Oh, I think that sounds good

So what have you been up to lately? Like I said, it's been a while since we've worked together

You are really, really busy on Iron Chef, aren't you? I think, uh. You're doing a lot of judging

You know, I was on the Iron Chef over the holidays. I was supposed to judge that battle. Are you kidding me

And you know that check you sent me, I was gonna, I would have definitely given you the win

Well, you know what? Us girls got it without me having to pay you

Well, of course you did. Who did you beat? Tyler Florence and Robert Irvine

That's a tough battle. Oh, listen, those guys didn't stand a chance

That's right, they sure did. It was sweet things. Oh, oh, oh, no, my money would have been on you

Oh, yeah. Iron Chef is such an exciting thing to work on

and I'm amazed I don't weigh 400 pounds because the food's always incredible

Yes, but you probably only taste a little bit. That's the secret

But even a little bit can add up by the time you taste everybody's dishes

That's right, and as you can see, I have an entire stick of butter going on right now in this pan

I see it. Just my kind of recipe. Now, in my bowl, I've got some saltine crackers that I crushed up

I've got one batch of my cornbread, and this is not a sweet cornbread

This is a savory cornbread. You always want to use a savory bread

of your stuffing. Okay. So I'm going to take that and I'm going to crumble that up

And you're still melting your butter. I just cranked it up. I just cranked it up

We're just about there. He's got so much butter, he's having trouble getting it melted, y'all. We're almost there. We're almost there. Ted, I like

the way you think, honey. So we got some brown sugar. Brown sugar

and butter, hard to go wrong. A little bit of cinnamon. I mean, you could put anything in the world in this

pan and it's going to be great. Pineapples, bananas. Yes. Sausage. Do you ever like

Put meat in your stuffing? Sometimes oysters, chestnuts. We make oyster stuffing every Thanksgiving because, you know, oysters are so plentiful in Savannah

And it just makes for a delicious dressing. We have wanted to go to Savannah forever and haven't had a chance to get around to it yet

You must come. You've always got an open invitation and an open bedroom

Well, thank you very much. Now, I'm crumbling up bread that I've toasted off in the oven, and you want it dry

You want to get this nice and dry. Is that going to have butter in it, too? You know it is

I just... Of course. You know it is. Well, I've got my butter melted with the cinnamon and with the sugar

and we're just going to put some Granny Smith apples in here, and you arrange them in the pan, and you don't mess with them

Let them sit there for about three minutes. Because we want to caramelize them. Okay

Did you know my hometown is Carmel, Indiana? Oh, come on. I thought that was why you invited me

Isn that a coinkydink A coinkydink You been talking to Carson He uses that all the time Does he really Your friend Carson Kressley is a lot of fun And when we come back I want to find out you know

what all went on behind the scenes on that queer eye for the straight guy

So you'll want to stay with us. Don't miss a word of the next bit

I'll be honest with you. You don't want to know. Yes, I do

Next, Ted and I are going to finish up our apple caramel pulp blowing

I think you're the only woman I've ever been able to dance with. I'm going to make it easy

All right, you next. Whoa, whoa, whoa. I think you're the only woman I've ever been able to dance with

Because we both dance badly. There you go. We're a match. Y'all, I'm here with Ted Allen

We are making a fabulous pork loin. Oh, I got to get to work

Oh, okay. I'm in the middle of making my grandma's cornbread dressing

So I'm going to finish this. All right, Nate, you caramelized your apples

Yeah, we caramelized our Granny Smith apples with some brown sugar and cinnamon. Okay, we got those down there

And while we won't break, I got my onions and celery sauteing in lots of butter

Excellent. Now, I'm going to put my dressing together and you tell them about what you're doing

All right, well, we have a five-pound pork loin that we've butterflied and opened like a book

and then pounded it flat with a mallet. You have to let these apples cool completely before you put them into the pork

because this is raw pork and you don't want to put warm stuffing into it

And then we're going to roll it up to tie it. Sage poultry seasoning. Mmm

Salt, pepper. That's a lot of stuffing. It is a lot of stuffing

I love stuffing. Chicken stock. Stuffing's my favorite part of the holiday meal

Mine, too. It's a vehicle for butter. I know that's... You're never going to complain about that

It absolutely is. You know, I love pork. With dressing. I think pork is the chef's favorite cut

It's always pork shoulder or pork chops. And, of course, everybody loves bacon

Pork is so good. Even the vegetarians love bacon. So, listen. Now, you're not going to change the subject on me, Ted

I'm sorry. Because when we went on break, I was asking you about behind the scenes on Queer Eye for the straight guy

You're not getting off the hook, because I know you worked with that crazy Carson

Mr. Cressley. He's a sweet guy. Oh, I love him. I love him so much

So tell me what y'all did. Well, it was pretty much the same as it was in front of the scenes

It just that Carson tended to take more of his clothes off when the cameras weren around I don know why He took his clothes off Did he keep his clothes on with you He did On the show I mean Yes I sorry You

shouldn't send him a check. We did one episode where he took his clothes off and decided to

streak around the house. We were making over a nudist in New Jersey. So naturally, he thought

he should also be nude. And as soon as he got out of the door, Tom and I locked him out

I put his clothes in the freezer, and right when he was rounding the corner, our executive producer pulled up and got a free show

No. You locked him out butt naked. Absolutely. And you remember that during the William Kennedy Smith trial, Court TV had that blue dot that covered up the victim

Yes, yes. The network came up with a blue dot for Carson's certain portions

It shall remain unnamed. It was a lot of fun, and it opened a lot of doors for us

We're all working in other places now. Absolutely. Tell everybody how many people competed for y'all's rolls

Y'all, I added eggs, beaten eggs. Now I'm going to put this in the oven

I'm going to cook it for about 45 minutes to an hour at 350 degrees

All righty. And with this, well, we had about 500 people try out for Queer Eye

Unbelievable. Isn't that crazy? For five positions, y'all. What's really unbelievable is that they picked us

But it was a lot of fun. Did any of y'all have any experience? Had y'all done anything like that before

I had never been in a school play. What made you think that you'd want to even audition for something like that

I was just looking for something different to do, which I certainly got. That was different. I thought we would get our check and a VHS tape, take it home, go home and laugh about it

I never thought it'd get on the air. Well, are you going to finish your pork

I'm done. I'll tell you. Oh, gosh, you're getting ahead of me. All right, well, you take the pork, tie it up

You want to sear it off on the stovetop because it's really important to get a nice, beautiful brown exterior

And then you pour apple cider over it, and then you put it in the oven. It keeps it moist. And just roast it

Uncovered? Uncovered at 375 for about an hour and 20 until it gets to 155 degrees

Don't have to cook pork quite as long as what we used to, like in the 60s

Yeah, it's very safe. They've bred a lot of the fat out of it. Okay, well, look at here

I'm just going to make some room for you. You know, in Polo World. Things get cooked so fast

TV magic. I've got our dressing ready. Fabulous. You've got your pork ready

Yes. Let's cut a slice of that. Isn't that beautiful? Looks delicious

There's some plates over there, Ted. All righty. Oh, look at the apples in it

Absolutely. I'll just eat off your plate. Fair enough. With you, how's that

That would be my honor. All right. Now let me dip us up

Throw something green on here. Some dressing. Yes, we have to have our vegetables, don't we

Absolutely. May I? Yes, please. Delicious. Look at this. Now you going to cut us some Of course I going to feed you a little slice I got to make sure you don get any string That would be very hard to swallow

That might be difficult, wouldn't it? Tell me your verdict. Mmm. That's very good

Love the apples. I should have given you a bigger bite. I learned a long time ago. Now, one time

I ate a marshmallow on television, and then I needed to talk. Not a good program

It's going to be very, very hard with a bite that size for me to say thank you for coming

Thanks to all of my guests for coming. Thank all of you in the audience for coming and giving your time and sharing with us

The party's over, y'all. It's time to say best wishes and love

From our kitchen to yours, see you in the next party. They're good

I love your band. Gospino's how to dance

Oh, no. I ain't got no rhythm

You can do this. You can do this. On my left four fingers is a diamond ring

Oh, you'll make me wish that you could help me off with this thing

So you tell me baby

So if you tell me baby Then I might just give it

I might just give it You're a Catholic kind of voice

That a woman can't resist The devil himself don't talk as smooth as this

Evade the apple, now I know why You're making me hungry for some apple pie

Don't touch me, baby Oh, don't touch me, baby